Great expectations

Apprentice I feel trapped by life—and I do not know how to apply Dharma to situations where I feel trapped. Is there anything I can do differently?

Khandro Déchen We are never trapped by life unless we have a fixed idea about the desired outcome. What if you were terminally ill and within days of your death? If you wanted a different outcome you would feel trapped unless you let go of the outcome you had in mind. In a situation less extreme there is always malleability as long as we have a spacious view. There are unending possibilities for creativity in our circumstances, but we need an open view to see them. There are continual challenges which allow us to improvise—but we need an open view to meet them. In order to have this open view, we need to begin by appreciating irony. There is profound whimsicality involved with acknowledging the emptiness of our reference points—through which we may discover that agony is inseparable from ecstasy; loss is inseparable from perpetuity; and referencelessness is inseparable from the reliable earthiness of existence. This open view, however, is not based on fantasy or fear—it is simply based on being here, without great expectations.